“Odd”: An Odd Choice of Words

My morbid regard for not being eaten alive in my own backyard reached new heights on reading this news story. According to Google Maps, if the creature in question drove along main roads at or below the speed limit, it could be at my front door in “about 7 mins”, which gives it plenty of time. It could be in my backyard right now. just a moment …

Anyway, I have a number of issues with the article and the persons and organisations portrayed within.

‘He let out a hiss at him and that’s when I knew the mountain lion was in my backyard,’ Elliott said.” : Huh. Must have been a Girl Guide I suppose. I expect she inspected the paw prints and measured the space between the claw marks left on her dog before deciding that she wasn’t dealing with a furry snake of some kind.

The Division of Wildlife let the cat stay at the house overnight because it was too dark to tranquilize it.” : No, a friend stays at your house overnight because they’re too drunk to drive home. For a mountain lion you just use a tranquilizer gun and a new and exotic piece of technology called a “flashlight”. Really, it’s simple. And no cup of coffee and a shower in the morning either.

When the D.O.W returned Sunday morning, the cat was already gone.” : I’ve never had that happen with drunk friends — they’re usually still snoring at 9 am. Apparantly mountain lions are different. And come to think of it, the D.o.W. went away and came back the next morning? What kind of service is that? Why didn’t the residents wrest the weaponry away from the D.o.W. ninja operatives and manage the matter themselves, I wonder?

“…it’s odd to find a mountain lion in a neighborhood like this” : Yes, “odd”, that’s exactly the word I used when I heard about this. Not “freakishly terrifying” or “insanely horrific”. “Odd“. Guess which spokesman lives about twenty miles away, and has his own tranquilizer gun?

The D.O.W said they’ll be keeping an eye on the neighborhood“. During working hours only I expect. Apparantly the D.o.W. has a better Union than the lions.

Well, that’s helped clear up another mystery, though. Apparantly that guy pays closer attention to the news than me.

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5 thoughts on ““Odd”: An Odd Choice of Words

  1. Animals don’t just drop when they are tranquilized, they can do quite a bit of damage first, you can’t be sure they get a proper dose. I think this was similar to a doctor’s “take two aspirin and call me in the morning” – they know the cat will probably just go away on its own. After snacking on the Pekinese a few blocks down…

    One of my neighbors discovered a cougar had a litter in his cabana next to his pool. She moved them soon after the encounter.

  2. We thought we would become rural Canadians and purchase a house a few kilometers from town.

    Our first night in the house, we are outside enjoying our new acreage and being proud new home owners. We hurried the children quickly into the house when we looked across the property and watched what appeared to be a economy car sized black bear ambling it’s way to the small lake across the road from us.Turns out he is a neighbour and has been in the area for a few years. He doesn’t bother anybody and leaves garbages alone.

    He is a lot smaller than he looked too, guess it was the deep seeded fear in our genome that made it look bigger to get us out of there even faster.

    Now deer, moose, coyote, bear and cougar sightings are almost common place with deer bedding down on our property in the autumn months.

    Joel is very correct about the tranquilizer guns not being very quick if a untrained fool is on the other end. A few years ago we had the misfortune of watching two fine RCMP officers who were in way over their head aid a game official trying to tranquilize a black bear who had decided the local fast food restaurant garbage shed was his new home.

    After watching him spin and toss at the dart that they hit him with, they ended up having to shoot him at him over 30 times with their pistols because he took his rage out on their police cruiser and they thought he might come after them – rightly so. There was no word on how many times they hit him, they emptied their pistols in his general direction, only a few meters away.

    Very sad moment. Caused lots of outrage in our smallish community. The poor RCMP offices were unfairly crucified by the local media to the point where both of them were transfered out within 6 months.

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